ARE WE DONE YET???

For real, this is my daily question… “Are we done yet?” Not with parenting. But with documents. And obeying an orphanage director’s ever-changing visiting schedule. And with a hotel room.  And with being away from home.  And with not having any Charmin (sometimes it’s the little things that send you right over the edge).  We are getting close, I tell you.  In just about 2 hours, Rod and Jarrod will be back here with me (YAY!!!!) to finalize our adoption.  We seriously think we could be home in less than 2 weeks.  Last night I asked the Lord once again for quickness and smoothness of the remainder of the process, because such an answer would mean that all 8 Smiths could be at Burnt Hickory Baptist Church together in just TWO Sundays!! If that were to happen, oh my word! Remember that time in Scripture in 2 Samuel when David was dancing before the Lord with all his might, and then Saul’s daughter got herself all in a lather over it, and then David said (2 Samuel 6:21b-22) “I will celebrate before the Lord. I will become even more undignified than this…” Just a heads up…. THAT WILL BE ME!!!

BUT… I also remember that I asked the Lord for a release from the 10 day waiting period after court so we could get our kids out of the orphanage and home much sooner. That was not God’s plan. And, as I look back, I am so grateful.  Because sometimes the most growth and the most learning and the most surrender comes in the hardest days.  I needed to be still for awhile before we went home. I needed to stop the whirlwind of in-country process before the whirlwind of West Cobb living. I needed to hang out with my kids while not having any other responsibility but to hang out with my kids. I needed to look in Evan’s eyes a lot. Nicholas and AnnaBelle are not afraid to come to America. They have lived with us before. But Evan needed time.  He needed to ask a lot of questions and settle some things in his heart.  Not that he told me all that, but I saw it in his eyes because God did not answer my prayer to “hurry this thing up”.  SO, we will be home in God’s timing. And it will be utter perfection.

Which brings me to something I’ve wanted to say on all the blogs so far, but haven’t known quite how.  I just typed “Coming home will be utter perfection.”  No doubt.  But it will be utter perfection because it is utterly God’s plan for our family. Not because it has been easy. And certainly not because it will be easy at home.  We ALL have a whopper of a journey ahead of us.  Can I just re-emphasize for a minute that we do not want to paint the picture that adoption is easy.  We have some cute pictures (ok, the pics are beyond precious). We have some hilarious stories.  We are so so  humbled and thrilled.  We are hopelessly in love with our new kids.  But I want to be honest enough to say that the process is difficult in every way.  It is stressful and it is heart wrenching and it is invasive and it is time consuming and it is expensive and it is terrifying at times.  And that is before you ever get to the orphanage.  After that, every moment has to be surrendered to the Lord.  Then, we come home.  And we become a family to precious ones that have never had a family.  Ever. I struggle with being too honest because I long for more children to be adopted.  If you ever go to an orphanage, you will long for the same thing.  I desperately want for other believers to get up off the couch and go rescue these wounded little ones.  And then I struggle with painting nothing but a rosy picture, because I now know that adoption is for those whom God has called.  I will tell you that I do believe more are called than are answering.  Not to toot the Smith horn, because we should have done this a long time ago.  I have had to confess that to our oldest three kids.  As I watch them have such willing hearts to go to the “hard places” in ministry, and as I watch them participate in things such as Passion 2012, where students are laying down their lives for the cause of Christ, I am moved beyond words in my heart.  But here is the thing: Rod and I desperately want to be the ones leading our kids, not the other way around.  I don’t want my kids or their friends having to show me what a surrendered life looks like.  I want to be the example for them.  Psalms talks about “one generation declaring to the next”, not the other way around.  Rod and I want to “live out loud”.  And we want our kids too, as well.  And, again, it is not easy. Because I don’t know where God will call them.  But if I’m going to stand next to them in church and sing “Wherever He leads, I’ll go”, then I best better mean it. For us and for them. Preaching a sermon to myself here. Not y’all.

While here, I am reading “Sun Stand Still” by Steven Furtick.  Here is some of what I read…..

"You don't have to settle for the mundane. You can participate in the miraculous....You don't get to participate in a high calling without paying a high cost.... Effecting change in the world is rarely accidental. It's a result of intention and focus.... You will pay a tremendous price to operate in an audacious anointing. And the level of your impact will be directly proportional to the price you are willing to pay... When you ask God to do the impossible, He usually instructs you to do something uncomfortable. And inconvenient. Salvation is free. Obedience can be very costly."  How will God accomplish the impossible vision He has planted in your heart? By His grace -- and through your willingness to sacrifice your life for the sake of Jesus.... When you really understand God's work in you, your natural desire will be to surrender your life to Him.   And before God can do an impossible work in your world, you need to let Him do a deep work in your heart."

Wow.  Much work to do, Lisa Smith.  Much work to do.